This communicates “I will be with you and sharing the joy of life with you in the future” in a very specific, identifiable way. Each time you discuss the plans, you confirm that your picture of the future includes her. Find games that are her favorites and set up consistent patterns where she gets to play those with you. Something as simple as saying “Let’s play Go Fish!” can be calming. Make extra efforts to include her. Find a way for her to help in the kitchen, or making beds, or other tasks, even when you don’t really need the help. It’s a way of saying, “You are a responsible, permanent member of this family, not a guest.” Following up on the prior point, when you do have guests over, make sure your daughter is helping you host, and is not being treated as one of the guests.
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